I realized something that I need to try and track my moods, the swings and slides and see see if I can anticipate the bad days and the super energy days and stop saying yes to so many things at once. This page is for me to track those swings-n-slides of my brain, everyday day I ask myself = how are you feeling today?
10/23 – its been a few days, but mostly been feeling tired, really tired, today I feel stuck, like I need to kickstart my brain into action, little confused, its an odd sensation, like I need to do something but not sure where to start, hence the need to kickstart the wiring
10/18 – mellow, upset, sad
10/16 – wow its already the 16th, where did the month go? Feeling- energetic, on track
10/15 Confused, tired, overwhelmed, sluggish like a snail, too much to do. Ok, so do one thing, one thing only, take the first step and get one thing done.
10/14 In fact today, one of my clients called all agitated and normally that would just piss me off but today I told him good morning and he said “well for you” and my reply was to tell him that my morning was good, his could be too if he decided it could be.
9/24 I feeling quite hypomania, racing thoughts, hyper, excess energy and wrote on my wall: figured out how to combat the racing thoughts, the circling feeling of never getting anything done = drink a beer, this too shall pass soon, it always does and once I calm down I realized something, I need to track when phases occur and maybe I can stop saying yes to too many things when I’m feeling hyper, it always happens, I feel amazing, like superwoman and think I can do all these things and say yes to everyone and everything thing and then I come crashing down and wonder why the hell I have so much work piled up, when did I agree to all this work and when did I actually think I had time to do all this work. I don’t remember the crash but it must have occured or maybe it hasn’t yet but I do remember feeling overwhelmed at some point but my crashes come with the need to cry and feeling overwhelmed and extremely energized.
Anyways, the plan. I have organized my schedule where I’m up at a specific time whether or not I want to get up. I do school in the morning, do my accounting and then afternoon, I work on client’s things. The evening I work on the remodeling. My day is scheduled out, if something comes up, I schedule it, I don’t just say yes, I check the schedule before saying yes. And every morning, I ask myself how I’m feeling.
I have a plan, the plan could change but I’m going to try and track these swings and see if I can anticipate the bad days. And no if family is reading this, I won’t go on medication for this but if you want to read more about bipolar stuff, check this site out
